Wednesday, August 31, 2005

More character

Ok so look, I was tired yesterday, so I forgot many things including the fact that yesterday was Tuesday. I went through the whole day thinking it was Wednesday.

So yay! Role-playing is to night and tomorrow night .

Oh and here is my second character. I decided to introduce him in a one framer. Let me know what you guys think

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

3 little pigs

1st little piggy.
Why in fucks name do you get stupid mother fuckers that think shitting on people’s creativity is cool? Ok see here I am looking for a newer version of particular warcraft 3 custom map. Ok so finding it was harder than it looked, because I had to wade through piles of lesser mortals shite! One poor shit head of a wanker decides that taking said map and populating it with a techno colours and bad heavy metal is cool and of fucking interest to me. I have one question ass wipe!
Do you know what taste is? No I am not talking about that bilious sensation I get in my mouth when my stomach decides to critique your work.

2nd little piggy
Wow that was Acetic! Ok sorry folks I am a little pissed of at the world today. Why? Well I am glad you asked. You see it’s like this: I am programmer, and a good one by many people’s standards (at least I think so). Well we all should know what I feel about my profession. But why the fuck do I have to wind up with these projects that have fuck piles of data capture. And WHY I must do it?

3rd Little piggy
Also I made a one framer this weekend. I would post it here but I left at home today. I will try remembering it tomorrow. It’s the insomnia I tell you! Why the hell is insomnia such a bitch you ask? Well has anyone managed to actually do anything useful while in the grips of the anti-sandman? I have a bucket load of shit to do and no bloody drive to do it. Sniff poor me, feel sorry for me… If you dare…. Or care… Don’t see if I do!

Hmm DnD tonight, yay! Murphy told me I should fall asleep during the game… I hate him!

Since we out west!
Ah yes and tomorrow I DM my DnD game. Hmmm this is going to be fun. I wonder what joys I should throw at my little sausages! Oh that reminds me SynKronos should be Joining my game tomorrow. Well he is a bit of a pork banger to be honest. And me? Well I am a burger patty. Wow is this DnD or breakfast?

ok girls and boys play nice

Friday, August 26, 2005

Excrement Al!

Alright so I was wrong about the zombie cat reference. It appears that my cat is in fact not the undead risen to plague the world with morbid pleas for food. Oh no its cadaverous carcass is but a shell for a demon of vilest tendencies.

Could not my cat be possessed by a greater demon of destruction or blasphemy? Hey even a lesser one would do. I would not have minded if she were taken over by some horrid twisted defiler of virgins and small Chihuahuas. I would have jumped for glee if she was host to a twisted mind flayer of DOOOOOOOM!
No I would have to get the bloody shit demon.

Well at least the shit was not bloody. I know because it was everywhere. Wait! wait.. Let us paint the scene (or did the cat do that already?)
I have just come home from my Thursday game tired exhausted and really needing a sit down. After fumbling with the keys in the dark for half an hour I manage to enter the house without forcibly removing the door from this reality. “Hmmm” says I, “is that not the faint wafting fumes of feces! Nah that’s just the litter box, yuk!”

Sooo I grab a beer and a seat on the couch. “Ahhh some rest at last… oh hi there Nora cat where you been? ..ohhh!” See that’s me fainting from the lack of oxygen to the brain. Yes the blue yellow green haze following my cat and near throttled me to death.

See what happens is this! Demon:
“I will utterly ruin this poor sods day! Why? Because he did not feed us the food that would kill this mortal host and he subjected us to the VET today!”
So demon caused the cat to make the unholy shit. Added two doses of fetid urine and mixed until the merest glance at the gross consistency caused a passing mortals stomach lining to leap for it purchase and attempt to strangle said mortal. Gently the cat was rolled in the mixture until evenly coated. The Cat was then left on white cushion to cure for a few minutes. *demonic laugh* “Serve warm!”

Ok so there I am passed out on the couch the cat has just completed its little jig of evil all over the couch and me. At this point the stench has abated to an intolerable hell, enough oxygen has reach my brain to give the gag reflex a kick start. Now I am awake, needing a bath, and have a veritable FUCKTON of washing to do. Great I love my life!

And where is Baheelza-Cat? Oh this one has just finished making the dance of evil all over the bed and is now headed for my study!
Well lets say the kitty got clean quickly, and leave that at that. The washing did not.

Maid comes on a Friday. Thank the gods its Friday!

Party hard girls and boys!

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Dude Boobies are hard to draw.

Hello all you nasty blog fiends.
So there I was sitting at my Wednesday DND game, showing off my newfound drawing skills. Says the Rogue to me “Hey can you only draw guys or can you draw girls too?”
“Well” thinks I "how hard can it be?"
“Same kind of body structure just add some boobs… right?”
Ya Right whateva! Ok so drawing the boobs is a lot harder than it sounds. I mean two luscious shaped orbs ‘o the pleasure should be relatively easy for someone who thinks about them oh ever six seconds (yes I do think about sex every 3 seconds, but come on there is so much more of the womanly figure to consider!)

Ok so how the blue blazers do you draw said puppies? Well perhaps I need to do some research. “Internet!” you say. Well yes, if you want boobs to be rock hard protrusions of impossible proportion obviously maintained by the magical antigravity properties of silicon.
Seeing as I am trying to maintain a vague level of realism and propriety (snigger) in my cartoons. I think perhaps only the real thing will do.

Enter all the girls I see in the real life: Stage left.
Ok so here is the thing: Ladies it is vitally important in this delicate time that your knee-to-groin jerk reactions be curtailed in the interests of art. I mean I will be most scientific as I take important measurements of dimension and weight. I am sure you will all understand and wear only the barest concealment that propriety will allow. I do understand that Cape Town is a bit nippy at the moment, but surly you can all see the advantages conducting such experiments in inclement weather.

At this time it may also be prudent to warn your SO’s that said experimentation is harmless and in no way should be construed as myself moving in anyone territory.

Thank you all for your understanding and ..ummm.. support.

P.S. So I am taking Zombie cat into the vet now. She needs a few more formaldehyde injections to delay any further decay.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Digit Al & Bad Music

Hey hey! Looky look my photoshop skilz have returned, thank the gods.
I only managed to get some of ¾ view stuff done before I ground to an exhausted stop.
Trying to keep the various elements separate is quite taxing I must say. (I am trying to build up a library of body parts in the hope that it will streamline the process of generating regular comics.)
He still has some work left on him with regards shading and highlights. Let me know what you think.
Well wait a sec… if its praise or constructive criticism let me know, if not…use your imagination.

While working I have been listing to the some of the music Bast prepared for a party at our place. Ok so somewhere between the colouring of the right arm and the torso, Avril pipes up with that insipid little tune of hers Don’t Tell Me.
The part that gets me is that bit that goes:
Did you think that I was gonna give it up to you, this time?

Well duh! Unless he’s a priest, sexually incompatible, or immediate family, that’s exactly what he is gonna think.
I mean guys only think that about it every 3 seconds or something stupid. The only real reason guys get messed up with chicks so that they can hide the frank in the bushes. I would not trust any fella that says different.
I keep getting the feeling that we are expected to be embarrassed to have a sex drive. I am remorseful enough for all this other crap my male ancestors did to everyone, and now they want me to feel bad about lil Jim and the Twins.

Don’t get me wrong here. I do support the right for a young lady to say NO.
Still can you expect the guy not to chance his arm? All I am asking for here is a little sympathy for us poor blighters. I mean its bad enough that we have to worry about walking funny every time a woman with any kind of sex appeal enters our vicinity. Now consider the average 16 year old boy: The very thought of Linoleum could leave the poor bastard crawling on the very stuff in great discomfort. Look: it’s a biological imperative that supercedes all rational and socially accepted thought. Hell do you think that swagger that most guys adopt every time a lass is about, is about looking cool. Oh no sister no chance of that, he simply doing the horny horse in the briar patch routine.

Actually it’s quite funny watching the younger members of my sex trying to maintain a level of decorum at the party, once they have sensed that indescribable scent that is womanhood. Hell it is funny watching me trying to complete a sentence at the same party, but that could just be because I am drunk

Any who girls and boys sleep tight and dream nice dreams.

The Ork Speaks

To blog or not to blog? That is the question. The appeal of blogging has up to recently totally escaped me. Or at least I have shown great resilience to the infectious need to spill ones guts like some verbally incontinent twit.

Well that was before schpat came along and bloody infected everyone. Thanks schpat.
Ok so here I am I have started this thing. Somebody will bloody have to read this or else.

Ok point the first: As some of you know I have been trying for a while now to do my very own web comic. Well after some time of stop start, stop start, I have managed to finally get a passable character sketched out. He is all scanned in and sitting around waiting to be photo shopped. But for some reason my computer skilz would not work after I finished the sketch.
I am hoping to do some work on him tonight perhaps I will have something to show off tomorrow.

Point the second: I hate programming! OH MY GOD It is the most fucking boring profession in the entire fucking world! Here is a hint guys don’t do it. Rather get some monkey with the social agenda of a charted accountant to do it for you. I understand that you could do it better, or even faster, but ultimately you won’t …face it.

Sigh! Ok well I really should get back to work or something.
Talk to you guys later.