Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Oh fuck!

Ok so here I am cuzin' some blogs and I discover that old plosy over there is going to die in his sleep. Well at least that's what they are saying @ How Will You Die?? . Well So I take the test and low and behold my head shrinker is fucking wrong. Here be my test score:

You scored as Suicide.
Your death will be suicide. What more can I say? Fact: Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. If you want to know hwo you will commit suicide, take a look at your second highest percentage on the bar graphs.

Suicide 93%
Gunshot 87%
Stabbed 80%
Posion 73%
Bomb 60%
Disease 53%
Eaten 47%
Cut Throat 40%
Disappear 40%
Drowning 33%
Suffocated 20%
Accident 13%
Natural Causes 7%
Ok so now I am a little peeved! 2 hundred bucks a session once to twice a week for like months only to be told:
You are ok and sane and you aint gonna kill yourself! You are a happy sunbeam, of radiant happiness and warmth.
Well it looks my shrinker spent all that time studying to help loonies for no good reason!
I am gonna shoot myself inna head with a gun! But I don't have a gun. I got a marker! That's it I am going to shoot myself inna head with a paint ball gun until the concussion gets me. Perhaps I should save myself the pain and suffering and kill myself with alcohol. If you try this a home children, I might suggest pouring it on yourself and lighting it, because drinking the stuff takes too bloody long.

Ok boys and girls perhaps I will see you again perhaps I won't.

PS. sigh!


moonflake said...

i got Natural Causes. I will apparently simply pass away in my sleep. Sweet.

Now if only these things worked :)

firstfallen said...

You could always try an alcohol enema. Quick-smart alcohol poisoning, to go.

ork_khrist said...

but i find that beer bottles in the rectum to be quite disturbing.

evo.llusion said...

Not sure about the validity of the survey, cause i think the cup of tea i just drank may kill me. Like soon. At least i got naught for cut throat. Knives make me edgy...... =)

Bast said...

I got natural causes at 80%, but suicide follows disturbingly close at 73%. Probably cos I live alone, woe is me. Hmmm does having kits count as not living alone? The two of them together definitely have enough personality to make up 1 mute human.